Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Darwin Be Damned

Hello, there! It's been a little hectic with finals so I decided to peace out and go to Boston for absolutely no reason. My friend sitting next to me defined it as "New York for midgets." She is currently telling me a "bed time story" about Care Bears and an imaginary friend we named Fez, after the delightful character on That 70s Show. But sadly, I am not particularly listening, because...well, honestly because I'm giant loser and I'm thinking about genetic variation.

Shit, they've fallen asleep. Will my typing wake them? I'll have to be brief.

OK, here's the deal.
If you took 9th grade bio, you probably know that women have two X chromosomes and men have an X and a Y. If you took 9th grade bio, you also probably have seen a picture of the X and Y chromosomes, but if you were busy daydreaming about how cute Benny looks without his braces that day then I'll remind you that the Y chromosome was smaller than the X. Literally smaller. And say what will about the bedroom, but in this case, size does matter. Turns out, because that second X chromosome is longer it literally has more room for genetic variation. So when men say women are complicated, they're actually right on target. We are more complicated- genetically. And all the while, women are complaining that men can't express themselves. Well, our aim's not so bad either given they physically have less room for gene expression.

And while I'm on the topic of genetic variation let me just clear something up about the common notion that men are more likely to cheat. Some men are. But not all men. According to my research, whether or not a man will cheat has more to do with Darwin than you. In order to assure the survival of the species (a funny notion now, given the overpopulation of our planet) some men are programmed to be monogamous and some men aren't. So when your best friend tells you "if he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you" she's probably onto something. Except now it's not just common sense- it's genetic variation. 

Alright shit, they're totally passed out and I haven't even changed my tampon. brilliant. 
But if you're a giant nerd like me and you want to read more about this, just shoot me an email (A.womanblogs@gmail.com) or a comment and I can totally lend you my sources.

But finally, before I go, I'd like to say one more thing. If I believe this, then I have to believe that every nasty cheating-induced break up is the result of evolution. Well hats off to you, Darwin you've done it again. Thank you. I'm so utterly ecstatic evolution is part of my life. We may stumble upon that monogamy-man, but if you're anything like me, you'll pick the monkey with the cheat-gene out of the barrel any day of the week.

Maybe we're better off with apes.


  1. out of boredom I clicked this AOL link to "5 secret moves your man loves"...they were all hilarious to say the least but the very last thing was this so so wrong...
    "Bonus Tip:
    Give him a free pass to go out with his friends alone."

  2. The biological imperative is certainly embedded to ensure continuation of the species and there aren't many women that will argue genetics as an excuse for infidelity, so this is a different take. However, our higher mammalian brain functions give us the opportunity to overcome our animalistic instincts, so there's no reason to write it off as simple genetics.

  3. Thank you for that wonderful entry. It really made me think and I laughed out loud at the end. Great post.

  4. Izzy: Ew. "A free pass?!" We're not child-wranglers. We're women with our own lives who appreciate that our boyfriends have their own lives and they SHOULD go with their friend as often as they want because we'll certainly be out with ours! just... ew.

    Rev. Joshua: I absolutely agree with you, cheating should CERTAINLY never be excused. Just ask the guy who cheated on me. He knows. lol
    I just find it so fascinating that biology actually backs up a double standard that's been there well before technology. Its frightening, and a little to hopeless for my taste.

    The DJF: Thank you!! And you were UNBELIEVABLE in sign o' the times, btw :-)